Why not you?

some notes on self belief and trusting the magic

photo taken on a retreat I taught at last year

I think we can all be in agreement that it’s normal to experience moments where self doubt creeps in.

The what if’s, the comparison, the anxiety that can follow. A small amount a relatively normal, maybe even good thing to keep us on track with our values and intentions.

But beyond that, well, it’s not ideal.

For most of my teenage years and early 20’s, if you looked at the scale, my ability to believe in myself has been rather on the low end. I’ve had moments where I’ve surpassed my own expectations giving me a little boost of confidence, but there was still this under current of not feeling enough.

I’ve done a whole lot of work to overcome this and feel more secure, but if I’m honest, I’ve really been having to face some insecurities at the moment and re-examine some lingering lack of self belief.

I’m sure you already know this, but let me tell you, it’s just not easy looking at these parts of ourselves!

I spent weeks feeling anxious about some up big coming changes (👶🏼), resisting truly looking at what was going on. The fear and overwhelm honestly felt huge.

Will I be good enough? What if the XYZ happens? Thoughts that, if not dealt with quickly, can spiral.

Then, alongside some bi-weekly therapy and sharing my worries, I remembered something thats helped me all of the other times I’ve been lacking in self belief…

and it’s leaning into this idea of “why not you”, trusting the magic of change and things that feel huge and sitting with what comes up. No more running away, but challenging the thoughts and replacing them.

Why can’t you do this?

Our brains, although less as we get older, can adapt. We can re-programme and change certain messages. For most of us, if we’re on a path of going towards something that feels exciting but also incredibly scary and unknown, we’ve already had that tiny bit of self belief that put us in that position in the first place.

Whether it’s making that move to a city, doing a solo trip, applying for the promotion, eating alone in a restaurant for the first time, saying yes to an interview, going to the party, getting the bus (something I felt anxious about for years as a teenager), choosing to bring a child into the world, going on a date.

Whatever it is, you’re there. You’ve had that tiny spec of self belief, believed in the excitement and magic of it to push yourself out of your comfort zone and do the thing that felt uncomfortable.

That in itself, is the magic, and it’s worth celebrating.

So, if you’re in a similar position to me, about to embark on a big change or you notice your thoughts have drifted to something that feels exciting, but maybe you’re telling yourself is too ambitious…

My question is, why not you? ✨

I’d love to know in the comments if this resonates and what you have coming up that feels both exciting and scary - lets cheer each other on!

Until next time,

Jodie x

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